Sunday, August 22, 2010

Ch Ch Changes

This week was a hard one. I had my first very real "I actually moved to Australia..." moment early on during lectures and classes and it was a little difficult to come back from. So a lesson in culture shock...just like anything in life, the newness wears away and the new becomes the unwelcome unfamiliar very quickly. It's not because I feel like I made a wrong choice or that I am not enjoying and learning here, because I think coming here was probably one of the best choices I have made...but it was also one of the hardest.

I miss my mom and her taco soup. I miss going to Chilis to go get desert with my sweet dad and Luke and Kelly Jo at 11 o'clock at night and talking about silly stories and Luke and Kristina's relationship :) I miss watching Thomas the Tank with Cole and taking him to go get ice cream in my jeep. I miss Raising Canes with Erica, writing songs with Shley, Tuesdays at the Tillery house, laughing with Jess and saying phrases that don't make sense to anyone but us, eating till I can't anymore with Kasey, being bored in New Braunfels with Kailee and Hannah, lunch at Jason's Deli with Mimi...It's really hard to keep walking down a road that leads you towards things you love and away from other things you love at the same time.

I felt silly sitting on my bathroom floor crying asking God if He was sure He knew what He was doing. I had alot of questions running through my head...Is it worth missing Kelly Jo and Luke and Cole grow up? Was I crazy to come here? Who am I kidding, a small town Texan moving to Australia is insane! There are very few other times in my life I have felt so weak and hopeless to take care of myself. But I realized that for the past few years I've said "God is strong enough" and "He can take care of me", but it isn't until you are at your weakest that you get to experience and see how powerful He really is. He is so wonderful. He is so many things for me, but in that moment I felt like I was with my best friend. And then I switched from crying about missing home to crying because God's goodness is more than I can handle. I love that here I feel the Lord in such a intimate way that I have to cool is that? I love it! It is the hardest thing I have ever done in my whole life, the craziest adventure, but I would do it again in a heartbeat if it meant I could get to know Him the way I have here all over again.

And what is sweet to me, is that just the way following Him and running after Him with all you have can be be the hardest thing we have ever done...To purchase us and keep us with Him forever, He did the hardest thing He has ever done and would do it again just to be with us. He is so perfect and so unlike the world that it can be uncomfortable at times...but I know that there is no joy that compares to knowing that no matter where I am or what I am doing, He is there with me and will not give me more than I can bear.

"I lift my eyes up to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved, he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber or sleep.

The Lord is your keeper, the Lord is your shade at your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil, He will keep your life. The Lord will keep your coming and going out from now till forevermore."

Psalms 121

The Lord loves you and you are complete in Him. He is so faithful. Be encouraged and know that someone in Australia misses you and is praying that God will bless you beyond your wildest dreams and expeactations as I know He so enjoys doing.

Me and Angela at Darling Harbor in the birdcage chairs that we love! This girl makes my life a joy, God is such a genius...he knew we would need each other :)

Be brave,



  1. Liar Lindsey!! I miss you friend. I'm so excited for all you're learning...keep it up so you can keep teaching me :) I miss writing songs with you too. Pretty sure I'll have a bunch of half written songs for you to finish when you get back :) ok I love you so much and miss you! Let me know when you can skype.

  2. Oh sweet lady, SO teary as I read this. I am sure your family is missing you!!!! Yes, growing up is hard but God is building SUCH character in you (as if you didn't have enough)....Madi said she was praying for you the other day. You are SO not forgotten by any of us. Love you!!!